A Letter to the Mother Who Feels Like Her Spiritual Maternity Is a Consolation Prize // Ann Koshute

In this sixth episode of the Letters to Mothers season, we’re talking about infertility. What if you long for physical motherhood and spiritual motherhood feels like a consolation prize, like a second-rate motherhood? What if you’re experiencing infertility, whether it’s a season of infertility with hope of a positive pregnancy test some day or permanent infertility and you wonder if you have any space in conversations about the feminine genius and motherhood?

Infertility is a burden that most women and couples don’t expect to carry. It can impact your marriage, your relationship with friends and family, and your relationship with God. On top of that, infertility often feels like a lonely and long path. But you aren’t alone. We’re talking about dismantling the lies around infertility, the importance of community in this journey, and how to support your spouse as you carry the cross of infertility together. 

Wherever you are on the path of infertility, if you’re looking for a place of respite, solidarity, and encouragement, this episode of the Letters to Women podcast with Ann Koshute is for you.

Topics we cover:

• Ann’s story as a Catholic woman

• The story of Springs in the Desert

• The importance of language around the experience of infertility

• How infertility impacts marriage and Ann’s advice for processing emotions and grief in the shared experience of infertility

• The importance of community in the experience of infertility and the resources that Springs in the Desert offers

• How to live in the present moment during the experience of infertility

• Simple ways of generosity and how you can be fruitful in your marriage

• What spiritual motherhood means in your life

• Ann’s advice for couples receiving a diagnosis of male infertility and how wives can support their husbands through that diagnosis

• How Ann lives out the feminine genius in her daily life

Resources for you:

• Springs in the Desert

• Springs in the Desert podcast

• Listen to A Letter to the Mother Wondering about Foster Care and Adoption, featuring Kimberly Henkel, co-founder of Springs in the Desert

• Today’s episode is sponsored by Rooted for Good - use the code LETTERS20 to save 20% at checkout

• Become a paid subscriber to Naptime Notes and get early, ad free access to all the Letters to Women episodes for just $5 a month

Discussion questions:

1. Has your experience of infertility left you feeling alone, or like you don’t belong? What is one practical resolution you can make today to connect with other women experiencing infertility?
   

2. How has infertility impacted your marriage? Have you struggled with objectifying your spouse or reducing sex to a means to an end of conceiving a child together?
   

3. In your experience with infertility, have you given in to despair or the belief that God has forgotten you, doesn’t love you, or is punishing you? How can you reject those lies, and who in your life can speak truth over you that you are a beloved daughter of God who is remembered and known?
   

4. How do you deal with the stress of experiencing infertility? What are some healthy ways that you can process the emotions around this cross and
   

5. Do you find it challenging to take things day by day in your experience with infertility? What are ways that you can surrender the past, trust God with the future, and be present to the now?